literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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