Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
