i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
