I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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