One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize