Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize