And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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