He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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