More tranny stories later!
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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