I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
