Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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