she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
she pinky promised me she was 18
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
