the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I think my fart just growled at me.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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