Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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