you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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