she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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