Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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