everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
we made out on top of his cat.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
