Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
