I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize