I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
