I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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