I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize