On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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