Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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