69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
