Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
