I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize