Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
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