im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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