i would punch a child for taco bell
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
