i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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