Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
we're making bets on your personal life
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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