i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
