their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
