Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
