I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
