i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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