I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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