covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Jerry, you need to find god
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
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