hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
