There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
