plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
