I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
