I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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