I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
