I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
this hospital has no fireball
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
