we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I have already put on my inside pants.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
