My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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