I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
3 2 1 whiskey
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
